Guess I'm not really looking for answers at this point, just coming to accept that we will never know what tomorrow holds. We do have a new bald spot and some more thinning hair. So far, this has all been in the same area, very close to each other. I'm having dreams now, that she is bald and I fall apart. I guess thats my fear, not the baldness but that I fall apart and can't give her the support she needs. I'm to the point now of asking myself how I can turn this into a minsitry. Not that I want to become a brow beating bible thumper to everyone that makes a comment but that they would see it in my love for my daughter, in the way I handle rude comments, in the education on alopecia I provide to others who ask or need to know... That I don't become bitter or resentful, but embrase it and make the best of it. After all, who wouldn't want to change their hair color, style and length at a moments notice with no regreats? So we will go hat shopping soon, since she loves hats so much and maybe try a few cute bandanas just to see if she likes those too. I'm not stressing rushing out to buy a wig for a 2yr old. I've decided to use this time as an oppertunity to pratice how I will handle situations when she is older and really comprehends every expression, comment, gesture made toward us. I have had some crazy thoughts, one is that if she loses all her hair, maybe I will shave my head as well, and wear hats ,scarves wigs or just my bald head out in public right along with her if she says she wants me to. I guess to most that sounds extream, to me it sounds crazy but also feels so naturally like something I wouldn't think twice about doing. My mom is on my case about taking her to a healing service. Not that I don't believe that God can heal, I most certainly do. But I do not believe that is always his plan, maybe her having alopecia is a small part of a much bigger plan to one day share her story and help many other little kids going through it. So while I pray for her daily, I have quit begging for her hair to grow back and started praying for understanding and acceptance of whatever God's will may be for our life at this time. Sorry,not trying to dump my beliefs on anyone but I had to get that...she keeps me frustraited sometimes! I hope everyone here is having a blessed day! Shay

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