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Bless you alopecia, bless you for being in my life?
My husband has been working on material for a class on character that he is teaching at a prison. He found himself researching Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, who spent 8 years in an unfathomable labor camp for writing a derogatory comment about their country's leader in a letter to a friend. Solzhenitsyn later went on to write the classic book - The Gulag Archipelago: 1918-1956 - and in 1970 received a Nobel Prize in Literature.
These two quotes from his book have been circling my mind over and over again this week.
“...And that is why I turn back to the years of my imprisonment and say, sometimes to the astonishment of those about me: "Bless you, prison!"
"I... have served enough time there. I nourished my soul there, and I say without hesitation: "Bless you, prison, for having been in my life!”
I am finding myself discovering lesson after lesson from these quotes.
Today I was thinking of it in relation to alopecia. Sometimes some of our most difficult periods are the ones that yield the most growth. We may not welcome alopecia, and we may not have wanted it in our lives. But what has it developed in our character?
I grew up so afraid of being different. All I wanted was to be like everybody else and liked. But losing my hair put me so far from my desires that I had no idea how I was going to make “this one” blend.
Somewhere along the way I learned how to be me. During the last 20 years I came to the realization that being “me” no longer requires me to grow a few inches of hair on my scalp. I didn’t understand this 20 years ago.
Similar (but no comparison) to Solzhenitsyn, the time without the hair has brought me to a clearer understanding of what it means to be Cheryl.
I came to the realization that what is added to me or taken away from me doesn’t change my essence. I remain Cheryl. For that alone I can say, “Bless you alopecia, bless you for being in my life.”
So, I ask. What about alopecia can make you possibly say… “Bless you alopecia, bless you for having been in my life.”
Comment
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Comment by David B327 on December 10, 2011 at 11:38am
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Interesting question. Of course each of us has to find our own way of dealing with life changing experiences. It’s really frustrating when you have a condition that you know may one day be curable. You can only really deal with this by assuming that it will never be cured, and if it does that is a great bonus. Otherwise you could spend the rest of your life waiting for something that may never happen.
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Comment by Cheryl, Co-founder on December 3, 2011 at 3:21pm
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I do agree that no one should be forced to grow. But, I also don’t think anyone is ever forced to grow.
Personal growth comes at a cost, the cost is some of our thoughts will be challenged. And in some cases those thought will be reinforced and for others changed.
For me, there was challenge and I believe that that wrestling resulting in change, hence, growth.
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Comment by LilyBell*Murphy'sLawLuvsMe on December 3, 2011 at 9:12am
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Yes Terri I need to look oh so deeply into myself and hope that maybe one day I will be as enlightened as you : )X
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Comment by Bald and Fabulous AKA Terri on December 3, 2011 at 12:25am
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Lilybell, please recognize that I wish not to fight or push you into something that you are not ready for, nudge perhaps ...yes. I dont know your story and therefore dont know in which stage you are at. If I had read this blog even 2 years ago I most certainly would have a different view on it. But I think you are reading too literally into the title of this blog and missing the story behind it. Do you think that Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn wanted to be imprisoned in a labour camp? In the end tho he did find a positive from that experience. Like Cheryl mentions "We may not welcome alopecia, and we may not have wanted it in our lives. But what has it developed in our character?" Im sure if you look deeply enough into yourself, you will see that.
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I meant that I do not feel that a disease should force you to grow stronger in the sense that the disease should be cured so that being forced to grow stronger because if it is not even an issue. I have far greater health issues than hair loss - I do not feel that I should be forced to grow stronger in relation to diseases but rather that a cure should be found for them. Of course, we do grow stronger - what choice do we have - I don't want to be 'forced' to do so - I want a cure. In the meantime I will do the best I can - but I will NEVER consider my hair loss to be a blessing.
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Lilybell your comment "nobody should be forced to grow stronger" is completely absurd to me. Everybody grows stronger when faced with an adversity. Whether its a move across county, a new job, a broken relationship and yes even an illness or disease. Its called LIFE. Its the choices we make when faced with an adversity and how we work our ways thru it then the adversities themselves. I prefer to take the bull-by-the-horns approach as oppose to letting them take over my life. In the instance of alopecia, I use the strength its taught me to spread awareness and give voice for those that cant. Im congratulated everyday for my strength and not because of alopecia but for showing that anyone can take an adversity in life and change it to a positive. And thats the key to life and making it your own
. Alopecia taught me that.
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http://www.alopeciaworld.com/video/aimee-mullins-the-opportunity-of...
well worth watching for all
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Actually it makes perfect sense to improve or change our ways of thinking or doing things when face with an adversity. Not just alopecia. If we didnt we would stagnate in life and never evolve. The is a wonderfully inspiring video done by Amiee Mullins about opportunity in adversity that I even posted here on AW. You should check it out.
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Comment by BTB (John) on December 2, 2011 at 8:09am
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I cant see why we have to suffer to improve ourselves its irrational to me hair falls out I just cant see what one learns from this lesson except that hair is pretty good to have on your head. I knew that before I went bald so the lesson was wasted on me.
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Comment by Karen Smith on December 1, 2011 at 9:19am
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You have embraced your difficulty in life and made something more out of it. Life is about choices. We have had a rough couple of years as a family, just one of the issues is that our teenage daughter developed AU. She got on with her life with a great attitude and does not dwell on it. I came to the conclusion,"what is your story going to be?" Life deals you an unfair hand and how are you going to deal with it? Inspire others and find ways to help or just give up? The second is not an option.
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