Where acceptance is all there is
I've had AA for a few years now. I shaved my head 9/02/10 and since then I have been patchy, then full head of hair, then patchy again. I understand it will probably be like this for the rest of my life... I've come to terms with that. When I do have hair I color it, give myself a fohawk, whatever I think to do at the time. but WHY is it that when I have a FULL head of hair growing great like this...
Then I start to feel worse than normal and my body starts acting up, it turns into this...
Its as if Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, POTS, and my RLS are not enough. They flare, my hair falls out. I just wish I could have more good days than bad. I'm on Short Term Disability and have no strength to do anything. I'm a 28 year old woman stuck in a 80 year old body. There are some days like today I just feel like I can't take it anymore. My whole body hurts, I have SEVERE vertigo and a migraine that has been here for a week now. I spent sunday in the hospital and Monday at the doctors and I honestly don't feel like I'm getting any better. Then everytime I shower I have a new place where my hair is falling out. I know I SHOULD NOT obsess over it, but I just can't help it.
Sorry to complain and put my problems out there...but I honestly just needed to get it off my chest.
I feel sick and I hate my body and my hair. Today is just a BAD day.
I want to go back to bed and have a do-over :(
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