Today I noticed that my Alopecia had returned. About two years ago was when I noticed it for the first time.
Honestly- I wish it would have just all fallen out instead of growing back and falling out again. I have always been aware that there was a chance it would fall out again, but never admitted to myself that it was more than likely going to happen.
I realized today that even though it is not life threatening, for which I am thankful, we all have a disease. We have a disease that we cannot do anything about. We just have to sit here and either put together some organic concoction that we came across on Pinterest, take anti-depressant drugs to control our stress, inject extremely painful cortisone shots into our scalps, or just let it fall out and be bald.
I wrote a post on here about a year ago about how thankful I was that I had this positive outlook about it "just being hair." Even though that veiwpoint is still there (mostly), I feel defeated. I feel likely outlook is no longer positive, it is now just "it is what it is." I know that it is just hair and that is does not define me or my self worth. It does not define my happiness as a person. It does not determine my career goals. But, it does affect me. I think that is the biggest point here. I think that this time around, I need to address that I am struggling with this. I do not need to always have this positive outlook, sometimes things suck.