It's Hair Loss Support At Its Best
I met the bald woman of my dreams on MySpace.com in the spring of 2007, and I can't tell you how grateful I am that she didn't summarily dismiss me as some creepy dude who simply had a bald fetish.
When I saw her photos on MySpace at the time, I thought she was as fine as they come and I let her know it. Yes, I knew she was bald due to alopecia areata because that was one of the first things her profile stated and she was bald in all her photos. However, it didn't matter one bit: She had me at hello and I had no intention of ever letting us say goodbye.
One of the reasons--certainly not the only reason!--I was so fascinated by her physical appearance is that she was bald and beautiful. Not bald but beautiful, but bald AND beautiful. I mean bald looked as good on this woman as hair does on Rapunzel! But even more importantly, when I shared my feelings about this with her, she received the compliment as a compliment rather than automatically rejected it as faux pas flattery from some sicko who gets off on the follicular dyplasia of unsuspecting women.
Well, to make a long, enthralling and never-ending love story short, Cheryl, the co-founder of Alopecia World, and I ended up dating long distance for two years and eventually married on April 18, 2009! Loving and being loved by her are two of the best things that have ever happened to me, but none of it would have been possible if she had thought it was impossible for a man to love a woman not in spite of her being bald, but because she is bald.
Now, I would be remiss if I didn't mention that Cheryl is a person who loves being bald. She didn't feel this way for the first few years of her life as an alopecian. But she grew to love not just her baldness, but also herself as a woman who was bald due to alopecia. These days, I like to think that her decision to so embrace herself eventually brought both of us unspeakable joy!
As noted in Psychology Today's Diagnosis Dictionary, despite the fact that "there is a degree of fetishistic arousal in most normal individuals who find particular bodily features attractive," there are fetishists who depersonalize and objectify people because of their physical attributes. In fact, a true fetishist is so aroused by, say, a woman's bald head that "it interferes with normal sexual or social functioning." The fetishist looks upon the woman's bald head as though it is an orgasmic talisman and thus treats her like an impersonal object of obsession rather than a personal subject of genuine affection.
Nevertheless, the mere fact that someone compliments your bald head is not sufficient cause for paranoia, panic, or repulsion. As Cheryl and my relationship demonstrates, it very well might be worth your time and energy to patiently but also prudently get to know what else the complimenter has to offer as well as say to you. Who knows, such openness may also bring you face-to-face with the serendipitous love of your life.