Comment by Georgie on March 30, 2010 at 12:35am

*hugs* I think you need a lot of hugs. I wish I could offer you some advice...but I haven't actually been down that road with my AA. I've been depressed about it...but I have managed each time to move on. Like yesterday I was checking out the back of my scalp because it was feeling kind of thin...yes, I located a patch that I must have missed....and weirdly enough there were already a lot of those stark white hairs growing around it. *sigh* All I can do is sigh and shake my head as if to say, "what else is new?" I cannot control the activity on my scalp.....there's no way to prepare. It's been 3 years now and recently everything has been pretty under control. It wasn't always that way. And I know that if I lose everything on my head....that I have options and I think I can handle them.

As for the emotional chaos...I've dealt with it before but in a different situation. It took some counseling to get through it. In fact, I think I'm on the verge of yet another "blip" in my life and have already booked an appt. with a new therapist. Just talking has helped tremendously. I hear myself talk and I can sort things out. The therapist often helps me validate my emotions and organize them better so I can deal with them.

My naturopath has also been amazing. Without her I don't know where I'd be.

Know that you are not alone. We are all here to support you and listen. We also give hugs.

Comment by Petra on March 30, 2010 at 1:09am

Hi Kelly, Sorry you are going through this right now. I've had my moments - the anger, the crying, the why me's. The anger is not there anymore but I still get the why me's. Is it normal???? I think so, or at least I hope so :-)
We have lost something and we are grieving - there is no right or wrong way - just getting through it and coping.
Remember you are not alone, we are here for you whenever you need us.
Big Hugs (((((((((((0)))))))))))))
Petra

Comment by Clara S. on March 30, 2010 at 1:15pm

Hi Kelly, yea that was me approximately mmm 2 months ago. Angry, and then depressed and I felt alone because I didn't know anyone then with this. I felt out of control and I'm the type of person that wants to feel in control of my situation all the time and here I was with a condition I had no control over. Sure glad I'm much better these days and there is one thing I can control - the way I deal with this situation. I can sit and stew or I can choose to not let this get the better of me. regardless, whatever it is, i've been there and you know, sometimes you need to let it out, feel angry and sad and every other emotion that you have. And when you're done, just know that we're all here for you! Here's me sending you lots of hugs and support! MMMM maybe you can buy a punching bag and take your anger out on it!

Comment by Pat Latina on March 30, 2010 at 7:28pm

Kelly ((((((((HUGS)))))))) I think it's a normal reaction. I think many of us have had episodes like yours or similar. I'm a big advocate of a good cry. Cry until your heart is content than you get up wipe your tears, wash your face and move on. I've even bunched a pillow or two if I needed to. Today, I've learned to look at the things that are good and think if Alopecia is all I have to deal with in life than be it. It can be ALOT worse. So, Kelly cry if you have to and be angry but before you lay your head down be at peace with yourself. You know what I did the other day and it felt weird when I was attempting it but it really became so comforting. I HUGGED MYSELF, REALLY HUGGED MYSELF, IT FELT GOOD. Love who you are and accept yourself. I think Clara might have something with that punching bag idea. And, remember you have all of us to support you. take care.

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