Comment by Carly Huffman on February 28, 2009 at 7:08pm

Hey!

How old is Hayley? I've had Alopecia since I was 10 and obviously, kids at school didn't understand. At first them making fun of me and being mean really got me down and made me feel like I wasn't normal and something was very, very wrong with me.

But to encourage you, you sound like an amazing parent to your daughter. If you continue to love her and support her through this, she'll be just fine!! Yes, it is painful now. I remember coming home crying and my Dad being so upset because he couldn't do anything to help me. There's only so much teachers can monitor and everything. But it was my family that pulled me through and kept me strong and eventually learning through everything really shaped me and gave me an unexpected confidence and self respect. But without my amazingly supportive family I never could have come to a place of knowing that I'm worth something despite the amount of hair I have compared to other people!!

Comment by Nora on March 1, 2009 at 10:28pm

Hey,
I agree With Carly I've had Alopecia since I was 8, that is almost 30 years now. I can give you the encouragement I was lucky to get from all my family not everyone is going to like you and if it is because of who you are so be if it is because of your looks you didn't need them in the first place. I was told that from a very young age and it may not be the easiest to do sometimes all it takes is somone reminding children that real deep beauty is in who you are not what the world wants you to be. Trust me when I was very young it made me shy away then real friends one of whom is still in my life helped remind me that not everyone is a moron and real friends will always love you

Comment by Tanya (Ash's mom) on March 2, 2009 at 5:05pm

Sheila,
We must be living the same nightmare. My daughter is 13 and this year at school has been horrible. For almost a month my daughter came home crying every other day because her school mates were teasing her. These are middle school kids and they are evil. Last Wed. my daughter shaved what little hair she had left and had hair bonded to her scalp in hopes to make socializing more bareable. Although it looks great she knew there was no way to hide the obvious at school. Today was the first day I could talk her into returning only to get a tearful call at lunch time begging me to come get her. The kids continued teasing, just instead of her bald spots now its because she shaved her hair and is wearing a wig. The teachers complain that she should tell on them. How soon adults forget that, that will make it even worse because now she will be the bald wig wearing tattle tale. I am at a loss, make my daughter return to school where they torture her and encourage her she is beautiful and talented and eventually they will see, or change her schools and somehow condone running away from your problems. I feel so helpless. I am suppose to protect her and the one time she needs me to I cant do anything but be the shoulder to cry on. What I would do to be a kid for a day and really tell the kids what I think of them. So let your beautiful angel know she is not alone, and I will keep ya'll in my prayers. Let me know if you come across a miracle pill that turns us into our kids' age.
Tanya

Comment by Joshua on March 3, 2009 at 6:54am

Hi Sheila (Hayley's mum)!

Its wonderful to catch you here, a wonderful surprise. Welcome to Alopecia World! Yes, I couldnt agree more with you about Hayley, she's just simply adorable, beautiful and full of the beauty of life.

The ignorant people deserves two slaps on their face and more...Hayley is a terrific person and a friend! You've done a great job!

Joshua
http://joshuablogspace.blogspot.com

Comment by Sheila Burton on March 3, 2009 at 10:40am

Hi Priya
Thanks for your comments, its interesting to hear how other people view these types of experience and it sounds like you have coped very well. I, like your parents, have given out a few angry looks in the past because it seems like the only civilised way to express contempt for the name callers. It just seems very sad that some people think its ok to be that way.

Comment by Sheila Burton on March 3, 2009 at 10:46am

HI Joshua,
Its nice to hear from you, Hayley has of course spoken about you and Ive seen lots of group photos at the NAAF conference. Thanks for your comments and empathy. I just think its very sad that people think its ok to call people names but thank goodness for the supportive alopecia community!

Comment by Sheila Burton on March 3, 2009 at 11:04am

Hi Tanya
I'm so sorry that you and Ashton are having such a horrible time. I fully understand what you mean about feeling helpless, it made me feel very guilty that I couldn't make my daughters alopecia better. But Hayley is 21 now and coping very well, I hope that gives you some encouragement, although I know it doesn't solve your current problems. Its so upsetting that these bullies think its ok to behave in the way that they do, by targetting vulnerable people. Rose Marie has some good advice and I hope that things improve for you both very soon. I'm glad that Ashton has the support of her cheer friends and of course yourself because understanding people can make all the difference, even if they can't make difficulties disappear. Take care
Sheila

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