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Girl bullied after cutting hair short to donate to charity
Fox News reported:
An Ohio mother is speaking out after she says her 10-year-old daughter was bullied at school because she cut her hair short to donate it to charity.
FOX45 reported Tuesday that Jetta Fosburg decided on her own to cut 14 inches off of her long blonde hair and donate it to Wigs for Kids, a charity that helps children with cancer and other hair loss issues.
“I have some family members who have cancer so I thought it was the right thing to do,” Jetta told Fox 45.
However, her mother Heidi Fosburg told the station that ever since Jetta cut her hair, “things have not been good.” Fosburg pulled her daughter out of her school, Pathway School of Discovery in Dayton, after she said Jetta was bullied about her short hair.
“They said things like she wants to be a boy, she's ugly now, a lot of hurtful things,” Fosburg told Fox 45.
Fosburg said she took her concerns to her daughter’s teacher, and filled out a bullying report. Although the school promised to address the issue, she said the bullying continued. She also contacted the principal, who she said told her to “tough it out,” according to Fox 45.
"And (he) told me that he didn't know of any child that had ever died from words. And that we needed to toughen up and deal with it, and he would deal with it how he saw appropriate, which was obviously not the response we were looking for," Fosburg told WHIO.
National Heritage Academies, which runs Pathway School of Discovery, told WHIO in a statement that they are investigating the case after a complaint was filed.
Meanwhile, support has poured in for Jetta. Her mother has set up a Facebook page to encourage her, and Fox 45 reported Thursday that supporters gathered outside her school to stand against the bullies.
“This is about building Jetta up and sharing this message so other kids that are bullied can know we’re behind them,” school show choir director Sara Reynolds told Fox 45.
I think it would be beneficial to hear from other parents who may have experienced similar situations and have the discussion on how they deal with it.
You can also visit and like her Facebook page and show your support.
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Comment by PamFitros@boldlybaldwomen.com on October 22, 2014 at 11:01am
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Cheryl,
Thank you for posting this. There is so much work to do to reach and educate the next generation in order to enable a perspective shift that makes room for hair loss - be it voluntary or involuntary. It is such a privilege to be a partner in that work.
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Comment by Alayna's dad on October 22, 2014 at 11:49am
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This is a girl that learnd what pain and suffering is. At the age of 10, she decided to do something about it! She is a remarkable young person, and should be praised.
It is unfortunate she had to experiance hurtful comments. Bullying has been around since the begining of time. Recently we had a local girl(12) commit suicid because of bullying. People are waking up to the reality of its affects when left unchecked! It starts with "words" meant to demean or disrespect a person. I understand the school principal thouhgt she should "tuff" it out. Those of us from generations past are all to familiar with that kind mine set, such as" boy's don't cry" bs. Hopfully our socity is evolving into a better, more accepting and educated country.
Just recently my daughter had a bad experance in(6th )class. Middle school is all I dreaded it would be. Some girls thought it be funny if they lifted my daughter's wig. The following day she did not want to return to school again. My daughter believed no one noticed. She has no eye brow or eye lashes giving her secert away. after hearing of my daughter plite, I wanted to hurt somebody myself. Instead, under my daughter's cool rational advise we wrote the teacher an email. We did not want a loud incident over the matter. The teacher was very thoughtful and said she would move students around in a routine way. She also told me the school has resourses for bullying. We have not taken anymore steps as yet. As I told my daughter, curiosity is okay. If not normal. That is how understanding starts. And yes we have to be "tuff", to stand up. My daughter just wants to be accepted, as is. She is much happer without her wig. Anyway, just my thoughts.
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Comment by SarahV on October 22, 2014 at 8:07pm
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My son has alopecia as does a girl who is also in 6th grade with him. Maybe because there's two of them the kids have been very supportive...but what's funny is that my son has expressed more concern for the girl than for himself. It's very important for the friends or peers of a bullied child to stand in defense....most bullies want to isolate their victim. Children exist in a social environment that they are very clever at hiding from any adult. If more children were taught how to identify bullying and unite to stand up against it, I think we'd have something. Adults can create boundaries, punishments, and consequences (as they should!) but the peer group of any kid probably has the most power to influence the situation.
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SarahV,
My hunch is that already your son has picked up the message that it is okay for boys/men to be bald, but that it's not yet true for girls. I am so proud of him for his concern and support of the girl in his school. You are raising a son who will have an impact on the people around him - and one who will know how to love a woman for who she is rather than how she appears. You are a wonderful mom.
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Hi. My name is Mark and I live on the east side of MIlw WI. I am 58, S, nvr married and I have had alopecia universalis no body hair anywhere for 45+ years. I know what bulling is like when your are young, and I even know what experiencing blatant ignorance is like from others young and old, when you are older. Just bec you grow up does not mean the rest of the world does. I dont know what advice to give you and your daughter other than to hang in there. To this day, (both my late mother) and I still look/looked back and wonder how I did that, how I hung in there. In a ideal world we could snap our fingers and change the pep who bully us into pep having the exact same thing, problem, disability. difference, etc, that we have, even just for 24 hours, so they can see the world though our eyes. What a sobering experience that would be. Take care. Mark in MIlw.
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Hi Mark,
Pam here. I have au as well. Most of my family comes from Milwaukee - by the vet's facility and the ball park. South 52nd street and more in Wauwatosa. My grandmother's maiden name was Hansen and she was a direct immigrant from Denmark. I live in Grand Rapids, MI. Other side of the lake. Small world, huh?
You are so right about growing up and the rest of the world staying immature and ignorant in areas in which they have no experience. I too have experienced the negativity, but I didn't have to deal with it as an adolescent like you did.
There was no understanding of alopecia then and zero help for kids to cope. And that sucks. Today things are changing - way too slowly to be sure, but changing. And a lot of that has to do with bald men and women stepping out of the shadows, openly accepting their hair loss, reclaiming their joy and sharing it with others.
I'm 64, bald as an egg and loving every minute of it. It was wigs I hated. And the feeling I was no longer worthy to be seen by society. It was worrying more about taking care of other people's feelings than my own feelings, comfort and personal freedom that left bitterness in my heart.
I've only seen one other woman in Grand Rapids with a bald head and that was as she sat in the passenger seat of a car next to me on the road.
But everywhere I go, people know who I am. And if they don't, they soon learn. I'm the confident smiling fat baby boomer who listens to the stories others share about hair loss - their own or people they love. I'm the only female shining head under the low overhead lights of a restaurant in the evening. I'm the one who answers questions, gives hugs and shares the blessings of au.
Okay. Having no nose hair is no blessing. Cold air hitting the lungs in winter and unwanted protein snacks on the back of my throat from bugs flying unhampered up my nasal canal. But that's the only negative for me.
I'm an ovarian cancer survivor too, so I can relate to folks who've lost their hair through chemo or radiation treatments.
Mark, I like my bald, hairless self. No, I love her. I refuse to allow anyone to take away my joy in the blessings of my life. I could have. It would have been easy. But it's a hell of a lot more fun to see my au as one more blessing that enables me to help others who struggle with the emotional and social effects of hair loss in a hair obsessed society.
That's why I wrote Boldly Bald Women, an Amazon Best Seller that incorporates the stories of 25 women members of Alopecia World into a survival guide / font of wisdom for women facing hair loss. That's why I talk in school assemblies to educate children and their teachers to help stop bullying and change perspectives about baldness.That's why I respond to posts and have a website offering a free download of "Getting Past the Pain - 3 Things You Need to Know. That's why I am in the process of developing programs to help women reclaim their joy.
I understand why you would want to snap your fingers and give the nay-sayers a mile in our shoes. It makes complete sense.
I have chosen to be a positive force in a negative world and impact people one at a time. I have chosen to bloom where I am planted and do what I can where I am with what I have.
After all, I ask you... what's not to love?
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Pam,
Thank you...I try hard. My sons confidence and self-image are a huge priority...but fortunately my family has always been more about character than looks. I know he feels pain over losing his hair. Three months ago he had a full head of hair and now there's nothing. His adjustment has been amazing but I know there's internal dialogue that he won't share with me.
His peers are fantastic supporters. I know that will make all the difference :)
My son has the best siblings in the world too...they talk to him about it and make it cool. They build him up and I couldn't ask for more.
Keep being positive...we do need people to live in the world of more understanding and to stop being superficial. Hidden or not, we all have our own issues one way or the other.
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Ohhhh, Sarah....
All that sibling support says your parenting efforts are paying off with dividends. If there is anything I've learned from having au it is what a character builder it is when I get out of the way...not only my character, but that of the people in my life and those who cross my path (never, I'm convinced, by accident). And bravo to his peers.
Your son is the pebble tossed in the pond. His peers are the ripples who will carry the energy of their acceptance from person to person. It is my belief that in your son's generation a bald head, whatever the reason, whichever the gender, will be just another hair style and totally unremarkable. Won't that be a lovely day?
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