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Alopecia...its effects on my kids
I have had AA for 25 years, and in the last 9 years it has progressed to varying forms of AT and AU. I have always had a life with Alopecia, it has NEVER ruled my life, until now. I am in a rutt, I worry nonstop about the effect that it has on my husband, my kids and my life. My husband came back from his second deployment in Dec 10' I had enough hair to cover, a little hair glue here....a little hair spray there.... you know I was making it work. After Christmas I gave up on treatments(injections/topicals) I thought that I would just go back to my wigs, it would be fine. Not so much....I look in the mirror and it is fake Tamera that I see, my husband encouraged me to try a differnt kind of wig so I went online and ordered a new remy human hair full lace wig that I could bond to my scalp. It was a beautiful unit, I bonded it and I looked great, but it wasn't me. So I gave it the old college try for 5 weeks, taking it off once in that time peroid. I took it off last Sunday and I have no intention of putting it back on. My kids think nothing of it, but it upsets me when my oldest son (8years) says," Mommy why does everyone ask you about your hair when we go anywhere." We live in a small rural area, that is good and bad. I used to be so involved with the community, and the school but now I am not. I hate going anywhere because I hate the 20 questions, I feel like I could save time and energy if I just rented a billboard that said that I have had AA for 25 years and a full description of what it is. I took the kids to church today and I just wore a bandana, I caught a few "looks" and I even had a rude woman comment on my "pirate look" I just shook my head, my older kids looked confused, what do you do? I figured that there is no point in wearing a wig because then people are like "last time I saw you your hair was short and now it is long.....is it a wig ?" So I went with comfort and wore a scarf, now I guess I am either very ill or I am trying to start a new pirate look! My sons have told me on more than one occassion that people have asked them about me and what is going on with me. I don't want this stress on them, what can I do? My husband and I have been together for 12 years so this isn't new to him, but for some reason I am even uncomfortable about my AA around him. He is just totally bewildered. Why has everything seemed to have changed?
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Comment by Tamera on February 20, 2011 at 6:46pm
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Well aparently I am starting a "northern Minnesota" branch of pirates....feel free to join! So far there is two members.....my 15 month old daughter who loves bandanas and myself.
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Comment by Melony Robertson on February 24, 2011 at 8:48am
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Hey i will Join your pirate club! Ive been wearing bandanas solely for about 5 years now, ive had alopecia for 16 years, i also have kids and they get asked questions too, and some kids like to tease them about their bald mum, which really breaks my heart, so i asked the school to do a talk on it so they were more aware, it helped a little. I have no advice for you im afraid, im in the exact same position! I never go without my hide behind bandana and have never worn a wig, before the bandanas it was baseball caps! XX Just wanted to say your not alone in the department of worrying about kids / husband i feel you too!! xxx
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Comment by Michelle on March 13, 2011 at 5:39pm
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I too worry about how this could affect my husband and kids. Today, I have enough hair to cover the spots, but a year from now, who knows? I know my kids (and husband) will accept me either way. I just don't want them to get teased b/c of me.
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That is what I worry about too, I don't want my kids especially, to be questioned about their mom. That is when it really hits home how little anyone knows about alopecia.
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